The Situation
What these have in common is that ordinary means have already been tried. Blocking, distance, moving, not replying. The practical steps were taken and the thing persisted, which is the point at which people start looking for something else.
What Is Worked On
The tie. Not the person on the other end of it, and this is not a distinction I make for appearances - it is the reason the work holds.
Nothing is aimed at anyone. Nobody is contacted, nothing is sent, and the other person is not affected and does not know. What changes is what runs between you: the pull, the influence, the thing that makes them relevant to a life they are no longer part of.
Three weeks, beginning after the review. The report describes what was operating and what to expect, including the part people are least prepared for.
Why a Third of These Are Declined
Because this is the category people reach for when they are angriest, and anger is a poor guide to what work is needed.
I turn it down where the request reads as revenge rather than release. Where children would be used as leverage. Where the aim is for something to happen to someone rather than for something to stop happening to you. And where what is described is a relationship that was already finished, and the third party is where the strain became visible rather than what caused it.
The test I use, and the one worth applying before you write: if the work succeeded and the other person was entirely unaffected and simply no longer part of your life, would that be enough? When the answer is yes, this is your service. When it is no, I am not the right person to help.
What This Will Not Do
It will not break up a couple. It will not harm anyone, and I do not do work that is intended to. It will not force a decision out of someone who has not made one.
It is also normal to feel worse for a week or two after a tie stops carrying weight. The gap is uncomfortable even when it is exactly the outcome you wanted, and being warned about it is the difference between recognising it and assuming the work failed.