You Know the Feeling
It happens with the same person every time. And usually you can’t simply remove them: it’s your mother, your sister, your manager, someone you share a child with.
What’s Actually Happening
Some people regulate themselves using other people’s energy. Most of them don’t know they’re doing it. It isn’t malice - it’s a pattern, often formed early, and the people it runs through tend to be the ones who are good at absorbing.
That last part matters. If several people in your life have this effect on you, the work needs to address your side of it as much as theirs - otherwise the next person simply takes the place of this one.
What the Work Involves
Assessment. [E] Where the drain runs, whether it goes one way or both, and whether the pattern is specific to this person or open to anyone who reaches for it.
A seven-day working. [E] Closing the connection at the point where it draws, without severing the relationship itself. This is the difference between this service and cord cutting: cord cutting releases the attachment entirely, which is right when someone is out of your life. This keeps the relationship and stops the drain - which is what you need when they’re at Christmas dinner regardless.
A protective seal, so it doesn’t reopen at the next difficult meeting.
A written report with what was found and, more usefully, what tends to reopen it.
What This Won’t Do
It won’t change their behaviour. They’ll still talk about themselves for two hours. What changes is what it costs you.
It also isn’t a substitute for a boundary. If the honest answer is that you need less contact with this person, the ritual won’t do that conversation for you - and I’ll say so if that’s what comes through in your intake.
Realistic Timeline
Days 1-7: during the working, most people report sleeping more deeply.
Weeks 1-3: the usual report is that a meeting which would normally have flattened you simply didn’t. Not that they behaved differently - that it didn’t land the same way.
Longer term: if the pattern is old and general rather than about one person, expect it to need revisiting. The report will say if I think that’s your situation.